Are you a family member trying your best?
If you are part of a family where a member is ill, you are facing your own difficulties as you seek to support your loved one. You may not know how to have your own life and at the same time be a good spouse, parent or child.
You try to be strong, putting aside your own needs to be there for the person you love, but your own heart does not get fed.
Over time, you and your loved ones begin to feel separate, each of you struggling on your own. The loneliness you experience can strain the bonds of the best relationships.
You need someone to listen just to you, helping you sort through painful and often conflicting feelings and find a new way to move forward. You need help to find the nurturing for your own heart as you care for others.
You and your family need help to communicate with each other in a way that creates connection rather than the separateness. In the midst of facing such difficulty is an opportunity for you and your family to come together in a way that can provide nourishment not to one but to all of you. Illness can be a time to grow the expression of love between all whose lives are affected.
I have worked with individual family members and families all together, helping them find a way through the hardship of illness into a better life together.
Has physical illness turned your world upside down?
If you are like most people who have been diagnosed with a chronic or life threatening illness, you feel like your world has been turned upside down. You may feel that your hopes and dreams are now out of reach. You may feel you are being given more than you can handle. Hope and faith may be hard to find.
You try to be the "good patient" by smiling and attempting to mobilize your limited energy to do the things you are advised to do &ndash medical regimens, dietary restrictions, lifestyle changes. All the while your heart is hurting. Underneath your pleasant exterior are doubts and fears, anger and loneliness which sap the energy you need for healing.
When you push aside the jumble of feelings that comes with illness for day to day functioning, the heart runs dry. It is impossible to find the inner resources we carry that are below the pain.
As hard as it may be to believe when you are in the midst of the illness and pain, illness can be a door to reevaluating the meaning of your life.
In order for you to have true healing, it is important for you give attention to the needs of your heart. It is important to rekindle hope and move toward your dreams despite the uncertainties that illness brings. Illness can be a time of finding new meaning and deepening love. What you need is help from someone who can guide you through the challenges of illness into the light of hope.
You don’t have to face the challenges of illness alone!
Susan Rahima Schmall, Ph.D., R.N is a nurse and psychologist who knows what you are facing and can help you on the road ahead.
Contact Dr. Schmall today to discuss how she might best support you.
- phone: (707) 318-4470
- e-mail: RahimaSchmall@yahoo.com